When a Roll is not a Roll..

I've been reading an interesting 2+2 thread where mental game coach,Jared Tendler,gives some great advice on the part of the game I'd give at least equal status to poker skill.I've only read a few pages and I can already see that part of the reason I don't play higher stakes at the moment despite having the bankroll is because I've already spent a good chunk of my bankroll in my head.

I'm hoping to spend about £900 on paying my council tax upfront next April,the usual £450-ish for my football season ticket in May,car insurance in June etc etc.Now all these commitments are months away and even making $400-$500 per month between now and then should cover most of them, but subconsciously although I'm working with $4.5k ( aprox my roll after recent cashout towards car) I feel that at least half of that is already accounted for and indeed spent.

I like the cushion of having a big roll.I can lose 10-15 sng buy-ins on a bad night or two and sleep like a baby as I know I have plenty behind.My Stars roll was down to 58 cents with 4 games in running at one point and luckily I took one down and have built my roll there to about $550 since then.To be fair I knew that even if I'd busted it,I still had plenty on Party.

Of course the fear of failure and the fear of losing more than say $300 in one session also put me off attempting to play much higher.( though with the quality of recent herbals obtained I'm not sure it's possible to play any higher!)

Maybe I should simply cashout a good chunk now and push the boundaries a bit more with the cash I do keep in my roll.

As per the 2+2 thread I often see winnings as money earned which means that after having such good month in September I was reluctant to play much in October because I knew I wouldn't run as well and there was always a chance of hitting a downswing and losing back some of the money I felt ( wrongly) was earned and in the bank.In fact all I'd done was to add Septembers decent profit to my bankroll which is there to be played with and which is designed to absorb all ups and downs at the levels I play at.

Away from the felt I did enjoy seeing Step A when I took Nacho to her Dads for the weekend.Apparently I didn't notice her new "scene kid" hair do.I've heard of Neds,Goths and Emo but being a scene kid is a new one for me! She did go ice-skating on Sat night and at least used the £70 skates I bought her earlier in the year,probably for the first time.I also met the the ex Mrs A's brother the other day and asked him to ask his other sister ( Step A's aunt) to try and keep in touch with the wee one as she doesn't have much of a female influence in her life now that her Mum has buggered off down South.

Righty thanks for reading and thanks also to everyone who pimped/showed up to play in Sundays Bloggerment.QKs losing a race to JJ was my downfall this week.

Back soon....