Ain't going out like that...

Not even two minutes into the Germany v Croatia game and the commentator is talking about how it could have been England.STFU!!

After going to bed on Tuesday night feeling almost in shock from poker beats I didn't feel much like playing yesterday.I suppose I had trundled along at $50 and $100nl cash games for a few years and although I've always been a winner ,the profits were not that much to write home about and I never really had the confidence or desire to keep pushing myself,move up and consider playing as anything other than a hobby.

The turbo sngs have been a revelation for me in terms of profit and they seem to suit my game well too.I'd always reckoned that if my work offered me two years salary to leave I would probably knock it back, as in truth I'd probably struggle to get a job paying as much elsewhere.( unless I moved back to sales and I feel I've done that,got the t-shirt and don't fancy going back to it)

Over recent months I've been reconsidering that and thinking I'd like to have a go at the poker if my work was to offer such a leaving package.( unlikely but possible)
There are pro's making a living at $16/$27 level and with two years wages behind me I could certainly give it a go.It would give me the freedom to play from wherever in the world I choose and I'd get the chance to leave a job I don't particularly enjoy.

As per previous posts I reached number 4 on the Sharkscope leaderboard for average profit over last 500 games 2-3 tables at $6-$15 and was making more per game than guys I know play pro day and day out.The main difference was that I was only playing two,maybe three tables at a time and I knew I needed to step that up to at least 4-6 tables to make enough profit.( great roi but profits pay bills not roi!)

For anyone wondering why a hobby player was getting so upset over running badly I suppose it's because at the back of my mind I felt if I could make 4-6 tables work well for me then at the very least it gives me another option in life.In reality it's probably been good for me ( yes I did write that!) to experience such a hellish time at the tables.I don't know if it's over but regardless it will not break me and I will use it to help cope with similar runs in future.

I've also taken a wee step back and can see that I was taking it all too seriously and putting myself under extra unrequired pressure.I made $1200 last month and after a good start to this month ( up a couple of hundred) I felt running badly was making achieving that again harder and harder.I've always been a bit too results orientated and never have been the "bets on two flies going up a window" type of gambler.Oh I can tilt with the best of them, but I don't have the kind of risk taking ,spin it up mentality that the really great players seem to have a little of in them.

In terms of taking shots at $33/$55 games on Party I don't feel I'm out of my depth there.What does take some getting used to though ( and is probably why I never pushed myself at cash)is dealing with upping my pain threshold when it comes to losing.I'm still at the stage of thinking after losing say six $33's that instead of that being standard and getting on with ,it's nearly $200.That's still £100 and a lot of money to me!

Anyways for now I'm doing what I did last night and going back to playing 2-3 games at a time.I played two Stars $16 turbs and came 2nd in one of them.The only other game I played was The Mookie at Full Tilt.It didn't start until 3am and it was daylight by the time I crashed out 20th.Despite the late hour I did enjoy the game and it was nice to relax and play a more social game.

I was also listening to their Blogger radio station,Buddy Dank Radio and enjoying the excellent tunes and chat.Buddy mentioned people thinking about registering for a tourney but being unsure due to low numbers.It reminded me of the Euroblogger game last week.Buddys great idea was to register anyway and then pull out at the last minute if you're not happy with the number of entrants.Makes sense if everyone is waiting to see how many are in before registering themselves.Just do it!

I did look after Step A in the end last night after she changed her mind a couple of times! It was great to spend some proper time with her and she even enjoyed my daft stories and asked for more.The tale of going on holiday with a girlfriend at 16,having to sleep in a room with her Dad,arriving back steamin' drunk at 3am,sneaking quietly into my bed...and then jumping out of bed screaming in pain due to leg cramps ( causing her Dad to leap out of his bed himself what the fuss was about) seemed to amuse the wee one greatly!


Ok,wee tune that seemed appropriate before I go...