Spot of Bother

I actually won just over $100 at the felt on Sat night!! Last night I began by running KK into AA at The Bloggerment.I've just checked and congrats to Weegem on making good use of my stack and taking it down.It was also good to see 14 runners this week.Thanks to all who played.

I'd noticed on Sat night that I seemed to have a wee spot growing on my chin.By the time I'd finished getting screwed over at the felt last night it had grown into an incredibly painful lump that seemed to be spreading down into my jaw.Without getting too gross there was no head on it and even using a sterilised needle only drew a little blood.Of course having had a wee smoke I went to bed convinced it would burst and melt my brain!I've run so badly recently that not waking up and having a death certificate stating the cause of death to be "Big zit on chin" seemed a real possibility!

It's still bloody sore today, but I bought some magnesium sulphate and have stuck a big plaster on it so hopefully that will do the job.

As promised last week here are the edited highlights of one of my favourite forum threads.


OP: Ok...bit of a touchy subject seeing as women do read these threads, however f*ck it. It's an issue........

Started going out with the Mrs 2yrs ago. She was size 8, and stunning. We have since moved in and got engaged. Over last few months she's started putting on weight with no real effort or care to do something about it. She's still stunning but now a size 10/12. This isn't a problem at the moment......

However........Looking to the future, I've always felt it important in a relationship to keep fit and in shape. Although I'll always love her, if she gets fat and minging I wont be physically attracted to her and if your not physically attracted to your partner then that can cause major issue's surely.

I know many years down the line when we're both rinkly faced coffin dodgers then physical attraction is in the eyes of the beholder and all that, but I would like to still think my Mrs is "hot" for as long as its possible to keep the body in good nick.

This IMO is a fair point and not out of order.

I keep my end of the bargain by keeping in shape.......big question is, should I say something now, say something's when/if she does get minging or just say **** all?????????


Cue the usual forums requests for pics.( or gtfo)


Some great replies:

She could be weak minded and not got the bottle to dump a sad sack like you so may just being going down the "letting herself go" route before getting pumped back into shape.I'm guessing she feels inadequately pumped.

Ride it aff her!

Cue the my boyfriends a duff ride and I'm comfort eating to make up for it thread.


Villain: I think I speak for the few on here who know who you are (although I wasn't the first to suss it out) when I say...... she isn't actually as good looking as you think she is and her putting on a bit of weight has actually done her some good.


OP:Well if you do know who I am....which I highly doubt.......Then I would say that she is a good looking as I think. IMO off course.And as stated throughout this thread....I have no probs with her weight just now..........i'm merely looking to the future and asking why alot of birds put on alot of weight once the move in and shit. I dont see any need????


Villain:Your first name begins with a P.And when you first turned up with her I thought she'd disappeared when she turned sideways.Just you be grateful for the recent appearance of tits.

OP:Ooooft am up shit creek now.....

Someone else chimes in:Care to retract the 'stunning' then?

OP: That I will stand by.....she is stunning. Am just shitting it cause I will be personally castrated if she finds out about this thread lol

Villain:I have screengrabs of both the 2 pages up until this post and WILL be printing them off and showing her.

OP:This is not good

Villain:On second thoughts...If you admit she isn't really that good looking (to be fair she's a 6 out of 10 when dolled up, maybe a 7 after five or six pints) and that you've actually done quite well for yourself in pulling her then I promise not to show her.


OP yesterday:



OP:F*ck off 6 out of 10............If you do know her then at least be honest here.
p.s your balls will be booted as well as mines if you show here this thread after that comment lol

Villain:My balls are safe P. Royal Mail is quite an anonymous service

OP:It's ok....I'm slowly but surely working out who you are.....That way I can find you. Care to eleborate in how you know me????? Might help me along.

Villain:By "slowly but surely" you mean you've looked at my profile page? Good luck P. And I shall elaborate no further other than to tell you that you weren't exactly the first to "conquer" her..

Couple of random contributions:

What's that noise?
It's the sound of the OP racking his brains trying to think who scuttled his porky burd before him.

Will we ever hear from him again?
Hope he's not dangling by his shoelaces as we type

OP:Nah......I've not quite reached that stage yet. I'll wait and see what pops through the mail in the next couple of days and there's a bloody good chance The Mrs will kill me first.Remind me never to post shit like this on this forum again.

Mod:OP has asked to be banned

Villain:Well since he's banned I may as well confess I was fully at the piss take with him.Let's just say that with a bit of internet digging,I took a chance on a first name that scored a direct hit.

Then I probably caught the biggest one I'll ever, ever land.

Job done.

The Villain later explained he just typed the OP's username into google - there is a post by him on Trip Advisor - and he signs it off using his real name...