Britbloggerment 15:Sun 9pm.Pass:Donkament

First up,thanks again to all who commented on my last post or contacted me.

On Sunday night I didn't see me ever posting again here and I wrote Mondays words with tears in my eyes.I've been off work and will probably remain off all week.Mrs A and Step A are off to Millport for a week this Sat, so Nacho and I will have the place to ourselves.

It's not all doom and gloom though.It struck me that what is making me most upset is the thought of not being here day to day for Step A and my dog.Hearing the wee one tell me to "chop chop" ( hurry up) in the morning, helping her with her homework,insisting she loves Johnny Cash as I play it during the run to school,watching her happy with her friends etc are just some of the things I'm going to miss terribly.I'm also going to miss Nacho bigtime and seeing him on a Wed night and for one weekend night just doesn't seem enough.

I will still get to see Step A and Nacho though.Mrs A and I have been getting on far better since Sunday night.I don't know if it's forced niceness on her behalf or just her relief at knowing I'll be gone in Sept, but if we can stay friends then it surely means I'll get to see more of Step A and my boy ( Nacho) and I don't need to mourn like I'm losing them forever.( which is how I've felt this week)

If I'm honest my feelings are still very much up and down at the moment.Maybe knowing I have almost 2 1/2 months left to enjoy the summer with Step A is what's keeping me going.I've had kind offers from Mother Acorn and my sister to stay in their spare rooms if I want but I feel I want to make the most of the time I have with Step A and Nacho and will only move if things turn sour/nasty between Mrs A and I.


I only played a $1.40 sng the other night as I didn't trust myself to play any higher.I still can't bear to think of telling Step A I'll be leaving as I feel so close to her, but we have decided to leave telling her I'm going until nearer the time.Perhaps it's a reflection on the state of my relationship with Mrs A,that the wee one probably won't notice much difference over the next 2 months.I suppose time will tell on that one.

Maybe I'm kidding myself on re my feelings for Mrs A too and it's just my anger at being given the cold shoulder over the last month or so that's numbed me.Again time will tell I suppose.

I'm still in two minds over my next move.I could go back to my flat in Sept and only have a fairly low mortgage to pay.The flat isn't in the greatest area of East Kilbride but I never had much hassle before and was there for nearly 10 years.I'm just not sure if going there will feel like being back home or like a huge backwards step.( thanks to Miasdad for the reassuring comment on that btw)

If I did move back to my flat then I would really need to spend some ££ doing the place up as I've owned it for nearly 14 years without doing much to it.Doing that in itself may be enough to make it feel like a new pad.

I do have ( or will have) enough money ( without touching my poker roll!)in Sept to rent somewhere in a better area than my flat.I've seen a 2 bedroom semi in a lovely area not too far away which would cost me about £1800 on top of my mortgage over a years rent.I could afford it for a year, and moving somewhere totally new for a fresh start seems very tempting.If I move back to my flat though, that £1800 can be invested in somewhere I own, and besides if I really want out when I go back, then I can sell it and buy a new place elsewhere.

Ok,back to being a poker blog. Don't forget to register for this Sundays Britbloggerment mtt at 'Stars.( under Private tourneys).Password is donkament and it starts at 9pm bst ( or 4pm est in Stars lobby)and only costs $5.50.All welcome and it should be easier this week as my fellow Joint Supreme Overlord ( we don't take our roles in this too seriously!) is actually playing live in Scotlands 2nd city this weekend and I'll probably still be an emotional trainwreck!

The Bloggerment is open to all bloggers and readers.Hope to see you there....

The long warm up

Spent loads of time messing around yesterday and finally decided to begin my pokery fun by playing a $1 Brit/Irish mtt on Stars with about 80 others.I was down to 200 chips after my flopped two pair big blind special ( gotta love 53 off) was beaten by a higher flopped 2 pair ( Q5).Can you work the flop out ? :-)

I won an all in with Aces and before I knew it I was chip leader by a mile and wondering when I was ever going to get to play a proper $$$ game! I very rarely chat at the tables I play at, but as it was only $1 I happily got involved and had a good laugh doing so.

I made the final table in 2nd and much like the Britblogger game,pride came into it and despite the lowly prizes on offer,everyone seemed to be playing to win.I came 3rd for $20 after my AK was beaten by k10sooooted.The poker gods must have enjoyed that one because a player won a huge pot at my earlier table after going all in with k10 sooted after a raise and reraise and the move was debated for ages afterwards.Well, until the player complaining pushed QJ and went out!All good fun and it was nice chatting to some of the UKFF crew ( Skivey,Minx-girl,Everton babe,Trikky Dikky,Big Dazzer,slimcraigs,jashawk,Paulo n co) who were playing.

After that I played some $50 nl at Laddies and won over $90.I decided to step up and take a wee shot at $1-$2 6 max ( I don't take nearly enough shots at higher levels)and after dropping $60 pretty quickly I moved to two tabling $100nl full ring games.I came out even there over two hours play.I did lay down AK after making the mistake of limping with it and then raising a King high flop.A big stack reraised me on the turn and although I could have been ahead ( it was $10 to call into a $40 pot) I laid it down.Maybe a little weak as he could easily have had KQ/KJ.I don't mind limping with AK if there's a mad tilter about, but not in full ring games like this one as the villain could easily have made 2 pair.

A couple of wee things before I'm done.I reckon the main difference between my cash game and tourney approach is that in cash games I don't want to appear too tight in order that I'll get paid off when I hit, whereas in tourney games a tight image is ideal for stealing when the blinds go up.

Short -stacked Seamus is putting out some quality posts just now.I loved his quote by Eugene Todd,taken from a Poker Wire radio interview where Eugene was asked about the caliber of play in the WSOP so far this year.

"“Brutal. So bad. If I went to the supermarket and put a table in aisle five and picked out the next 10 people that came and played poker with them, they’d be better than the f*&!ing idiots we’re playing with downstairs.”

Don't forget to register for tonights Britbloggerment game on Stars.See previous posts for details.

I'm off to Sainsburys to test Eugenes theory....

Britbloggerment 11 on Sunday!

Good work Mr Cloud and Juice!

All welcome!

I Call Mofo! ( + stats)

Apologies for yesterdays whiney woolly post.I should have listened to my Mum who says that if you don't have anything good to say,don't say anything at all!

I spent part of yesterday afternoon learning that ICM isn't an abbreviation for my post title but actually stands for Independent Chip Model and is a maths based method of deducting if a call/push at a sng has a positive or negative effect on overall tournament equity.I'd looked at it before, however this was the first time it really seemed to sink in a bit.Between that and reading Jennifears ( shark at $16 turbo level on Stars) breakdown of a tourney she played and the follow up destruction of her post by a 2+2'r and I realised just how much I have still to learn.( a ton!)

I'm not a maths guy at all and can only hope that my feel and intution lead me to make the right ICM moves more often than not.I did learn that it's not really practical to do ICM calculations during hands and it's more of a tool to be used to go back over hands and work out if the best move was made.This is unlike basic tools like Poker indicator and Sharkscope which I use to help me put players on pushing/calling ranges.

I did find it amusing to note on one article that the author dismissed us one tablers as recreational players.I became rather annoyed at that until I realised it was true!I think it was the implication that one table hobby players are just playing for entertainment.Sure,at $2 per game profit I can hardly claim to be semi-pro but I can assure such posters that while I'm no ICM genius ,I put in enough effort to not be overly bothered about playing with a 12 tabling "pro" tighty push or fold merchant!.


I did pick up one quote from a chap called Kajun on a Pocket fives post which I found interesting.He wrote " You also see alot of people isolating against an all in shortstack player with Ace rag. It's like wtf".

I made exactly that move in an sng and felt I'd played it well! The shortstacked player had just lost a big hand and pushed around 400 in chips on the next hand.I made a large reraise with A7 and beat the shorties 47o/s to win the pot.I had a tight image and didn't feel I would get any other callers unless I ran into a monster.I was going to ask if anyone out there had an idea why Kajun would question my type of play.I think the reasons are that a)I risk the risk of running into a better hand from any of the other players still to act and b)with A7 v 74 I totally dominated but if the villain had 64 then I'd only be slightly over 60/40% favourite and would lose too much overall tournement equity by playing this way.Any other suggestions welcome!

It all sounds very complicated and in some respects it is ( to me anyway!).I think the basic premise seems to be to simply enforce the old adage that the difference between what you can call with and what you can raise with is often huge and to reconsider making calls near/on the bubble when moving up one place can make a big difference to roi ( return on investment)over the longer term.

To the poker and I began by winning a wee 18 player $1.75 turbo I only entered because I thought my Mum was joining the same one.I came 9th in my first $16 game of the night and won the next one after taking the lead quite early and never looking back.

The cash tables beckoned and I had another decent night at Party and then Ladbrokes 6 max tables.I was even lucky enough to join a $100 nl 6 max table at Laddies and win a buy-in with AA v KK after only a few hands.It was a close call though because I'd bet out 5bb preflop and decided to flat call the villains raise to $10 instead of trying to get the money in at that point.I've been learning that slowplaying can be a bad idea not because it always lets the villain catch up or overtake in the hand but because a scare card ( villain has KK for example and flop comes low,I hit a set and check,the turn brings an Ace and action dries up) can halt the action.

Anyway the flop came Q J 3 and he pushed all in.With his action preflop a set of Queens or Jacks seemed possible and although I knew the table was loose ( highest average pot of all open $100 nl tables) I ended up reasoning that with a hand as strong as a set he wouldn't go all in and I made the call hoping he was on an KK,AQ,AJ,A10 type hand.

It was certainly a nice way to end my night!

Ok,don't forget to register for tonights Britblogger game on 'Stars at 9pm bst.Password is Donkament and it can be found under the "Private" tab.

There are eight in already including the current PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker winner,Daleroxxu!!( a fellow Scot) Be careful out there as this lad can play a bit! Are you up to the challenge?

Ok,here are my latest bankroll stats. Pokerstars $175,Party $859,Ladbrokes $1358,Full Tilt $1287,Pokerroom $567. Total $4246 ( + $362 since 13/5 )

Looks like I've lost an anon reader...

And the world has what it has been crying out for...another ghey poker blogger!Pop over and welcome Blantyres numero uno blogger,Dudley!


Congrats to three time winner Tan Orpheus for once again winning the Britblogger game,taking me out in 6th place along the way.Tan had been making regular raises with his big stack and I came back over the top with my 55 ( who said Presto was gold?!),only for Tan to call with A9 sooted,hit a 9 and send me packing.I'm glad he put my chips to good use!

A fine game and a lively chatbox as usual, marred only by my ( still hurting) poker injury, incurred by stubbing my little toes on the flippin' vaccum cleaner as I sprinted back into the living room whilst making a cup of tea between hands.I was also fielding phone calls from Mrs A and helping Step A with her homework so apologies if I failed to respond to anyone in the chat.

Overall I was quite pleased with my play as I think I always got my chips in when I had the best of it and when I didn't,I won without showdown.Good to see my good mate ,Al Eleven,back playing again and even better to see him exit nice and early.( that'll keep him quiet this week!)

After the game I hit a Laddies full ring $100nl table where the average pot was $54 and it played more like $25nl.There were a few of TAG's ( Tight Aggressives)
including myself and more than a few loose fishy types.I played very few hands indeed and the only raise I made with AK took the blinds and a limpers money.

I dropped about $10 overall but it could have been a lot more.I was tempted to play 76 from late position just to see a flop as the pot odds were good and I kicked myself when the table went to war on a Kd 7d 6H flop until the villain showed his 66 at showdown.

On another hand I folded Q2 in the small blind and would have lost to trip Queens on a Q 2 8 board.

No poker planned for tonight as the Mrs and I are heading out to see comedian Roy "Chubby" Brown at the Secc.

Oh,just off the phone to my Mum who told me I should tell everyone I know about her badbeat.Dealt JJ V 55.Jack on the flop followed by a 5 on the turn and another 5 on the river.Ouch! Maybe presto is gold afterall.....

Thanks Sharky

After a couple more out of the money Sng's it was a relief to finally come 2nd in an $16 turbo last night.This was after visiting my Mum and bubbling at a $6 turbo on her account.

I used Sharkscope to make one call with 1010 in a $15 game after I'd raised,two players called and the third went all in.The all in player was a complete fish on super tilt according to Sharkscope and that fact, combined with his bet looking like a squeeze bet persuaded me to call.The others folded,he showed AQ and my hand actually held up!


When the sng got heads up I felt I should have won but I blew it by trying to get too fancy.Once again I started the HU with the shortstack and once again I managed to get even mainly by aggressive play.There wasn't much limping by either of us so I decided to test the villain by limping in to see how he played it.He made a large reraise and I folded my Q9.

I planned to do the same when I actually had a hand but this time I would play it the same way and come back over the top.Instead I mistook KQ for a decent hand,limped as planned and once again he raised me.I dutifully went all in and then realised the story I had told was all wrong and that I was in effect trying to trap with a fairly weak hand.If I had a decent hand then my plan would have worked as the villain dutifully called with his monster A5 soooted and knocked me out.Hmmmm.

Ok,that's all for today.Don't forget to register for Britbloggerment 8 on Stars under private tourneys.9pm BST start time ( 4 pm est in Pokerstars lobby).Password is donkament and everyone who blogs or reads blogs is welcome to play....

After Midnight

Won one $15 turbo and my 1010 fell to AKs in another.Out the late night crap shoot and 3rd in an $11 turbo at Full Tilt.I'm also up bit ( don't wanna tempt fate) at the cash tables so far...

Don't forget to register for Britbloggerment 4 ,Sun 9pm BST on Pokerstars.Find it under Tournament/Private.Password:Donkament.All Welcome!


Ok,I hereby make up for the short crapness of this post with these two fine music clips..enjoy!

A Trouts Tale....

Here is the write up by Al Eleven ( Miami Trout,Miami Mark),the two time champion of the Britbloggerment game.To be fair to Mark he may have got lucky on occasion ( who doesn't to win a tourney?) but his game has come on a ton recently and he thoroughly deserved ( hold on till I stop choking) both his victories.Maybe now he can pay off the 3 card brag debt he still owes me from our school days!
Thanks for the write up mate.



"Before I gloat about the win I should point out that in this tourney I’m not really bothered about the money but want to give a good account of myself and not make any donk moves (hmm lets see how that strategy went then)………

First off it was an enjoyable game and there was lots of hilarious banter, nobody gets an easy ride in this tourney.

So after 58 hands, and everyone is pretty tight as expected, I decide to make a wee steal (yes I know the blinds aren’t worth it but it’s a boredom thing). I get Kd7d with the blinds at 25/50 and raise to 200 and zagga calls on the big blind. Flop comes 5h5d9d. I have another stab and bet 250, which zagga raises to 600 (hmmm pocket pair? If they were 10’s or higher I’d have expected zagga to re-raise me pre flop). There’s a flush draw out there with 2 cards to come so I call the extra 350 (I later checked the odds 40/60), Ac hits the river and we both check (now odds are 25/75), with the free card I get the Qd and make my flush, out goes zagga no doubt shouting K7 yah trout..

By hand 132 I caught pocket A’s (third time in the game) and Qixote8 re-raised me to go all in and couldn’t crack them and the $5 bounty from BurnleyMik found its way into my account (cheers BM)

A few hands later and I get 4th A’s of the game and re-raise cloud who folds, my stack is now over 4k.

Then comes the first grand suck out of the night, I go for a steal with A10, get re-raised by sookraboaby then cadmunkey who are both all in and it’s only 600 for me to call a 3.5k pot. Up against AJ and AK, I’m 80% to lose and what do you know the 10 comes on the flop.

I finally get the hammer after 180 hands (in the whole tournament I had 6 pocket rockets but one hammer what’s that all about?), blinds are 100/200 and cloud raises to 800 I put him all in and he calls with AQ spades, what a suck out somehow the hammer didn’t win!!

Not long after that move and another trying to steal I was on the short stack and back to 12/1 odds, this is when (I think) I played my best poker, really aggressive as everyone was nervous about the bubble.

After the bubble burst I had a stack of 6k, cloud chip leader with 7k and munkey on 5.6k… here comes second grand suck out of the night. Blinds are 200/400 with 25 ante and I get Jh2c, and go for a wee steal raising it up to 1600, munkey calls and I hit a 2 on the flop, now I’m hoping (without much conviction) that munkey hasn’t got a pair or hit the flop and bet 3200, monkey goes all in and it’s only 800 to call. He had 7s8s with two spades on the flop, no 7’s 8’s or spades on turn or river and I scoop the pot.

By This point I’ve had 4 vodkas and opened a bottle of wine at the break for my first glass of the evening (I thought this might sound like an excuse, but those that know me, know this is just tickling my toes – another bottle to go before any real impact)…… Cloud and I played about 20 hands HU before I decide to call a weakish raise with J3 (yeh I know), the flop gave me a J and I think I’m good so bet 3k, cloud goes over the top and all in, insta call by me because instead of the alarm bells going off I think he wanted to see a cheap flop, missed it and is trying to push me off a big pot… Cloud shows QQ and I’m going to be the short stack thanks to some very nice play by cloud and a heap of donkery from my good self. BOOM J on the river… and the howls of derision start flying – All I can say is I’m still standing in the corner of the room thinking about what I just did.. and counting my winnings at the same time!!

I believe there’s a bounty on my head next week so you’d better join up now, before the rush to get a part of that action!! "

The $164 ave pot table ( $50nl) + stats

Mrs A was out last night so after my pizza I hit the tables with the s-man.I played five $6 turbos and only came out on top in one of them when I beat the s-man heads up with a highly skillful move, when I knew an Ace was coming on the river and suckered him and his cowboys into going all in preflop.A quick "nh sir" from the s-man and we moved on.(and if ye believe that...!)

I managed to win an $11 turbo after that before taking my own advice on table selection and checking out Ladbrokes lobby for any laddies maddies.I'm glad I did because I found a 6 max $50 nl buy in table with a $74 average pot.That wasn't a typo,it really did average $74 and that pot average peaked at an unbelievable $164 at one stage.The s-man witnessed it and sent me the screenshot above.( thanks s-man)

I watched in amazement as one player ( haue76) simply moved all in on every hand and rebought time after time when he busted.I was on the waiting list in number 1 position and almost had to wipe the spittle from my keyboard I was drooling so much in anticipation.I encouraged the s-man to join too and he was very unlucky to get it in the middle with A10 V A4 as the villain hit his lucky 4 to knock him out.

It was an unusual game in that all I had to do when I caught a hand was limp and then call the enevitable all in that followed.I berated the s-man for raising preflop ( 44 I think he had) because Mr All-in manaic simply folded to anyone else aggression preflop and the s-man took the blinds with his bet.( sorry s-man!)

So just what hands do you play when a maniac is all in on every hand? Any Ace and pocket pair? KQ? K10?

Well I won with 88,A9 and Aces twice for a sweet $240 profit.At one stage the maniac had over $600 and although he slowed down a little that meant he only raised $10 preflop and usually pushed no matter what the flop was.

He called me a fish and begged me to call several times before showing his nasty side and telling me I would die within 2 days."I hope not,I'm off to the Dam on Tues " was my jovial reply.All I was concerned with was keeping him at the table and managed to keep him sweet after a couple of others at the table made daft aquarium tapping comments."Are you usually a high stakes player?" I asked."What do you think" he replied. "Thanks for swimming with us fishies" I typed back.

I added him to my buddy list and want to thank him for his one man mission to make sure I stayed in profit after a not very spectacular two weeks at the tables since my last stats update.Table selection,table selection ,table selecton! Don't leave home without it!

I joined Rosie for a wee $10 standard speed sng and neither of us made the money before I won $10 at a 'Stars cash game and broke even after 20 mins at Party.

We're heading over to my parents place shortly for a mothers day/birthday meal ( Mrs A B/day on Tues) and plan to watch Blood Diamond on dvd when we get back.I'm looking forward to a long lie in tomorrow morning before I take a wee blogging/poker break for a few days.( did I mention I'm off to Amsterdam?!)

Here are my latest stats: Ladbrokes $1349,Pokerroom $747, Full Tilt $1236, Party $447.Total $3779. ( + $109 since March 4th)

Seven registered so far for the Britbloggerment $5nl tourney ( under private tab) at 'Stars on Sunday 25th at 4pm EST ( 9pm UK time).One week to go! All welcome and the password ( lower case) is donkament.

Ok,thanks to The Cloud for his last comment. I think I've got the start time sorted.It's damn confusing because the US clocks have gone forward already and our ( UK) clocks go forward next Sunday at 1am.

Soooooo the sign up time at 'Stars will always show as 4pm and on the day ( Sun 25th) we'll kick off at 9pm thanks to the clocks moving forward earlier that day.( at 1am).Sorry for any confusion.

In fact ( I'm sure he wont mind) here's The Clouds fine banner to clarify...Nice work!