Monthly Stats

Party $4907 ( + $700 over 94 sngs) Pokerstars $554 ( + $206 over 14 sngs,2 mtt's and an RTR HU forum win) Full Tilt $95 ( =)

Total $5556 ( + $906 for Sept)

Party Graph for Sept

Muddy Mildred

Wheeeee.That's me off work for the next two weeks so apart from a stats post at the end of the month I'll be taking a break from posting here.

It's been a quiet week although I did drive 30 miles last night to go out on a movie going date with another hot looking Internet chick.She seemed a nice enough person ,but despite her good looks I didn't feel any spark at all and we seemed to be opposites in too many ways.Opposites can and do attract but she seemed a bit of a cold fish too and it was easy to tell we weren't on the same wavelength.( she doesn't watch Family Guy,said she's a morning person and likes to keep busy on holidays for a start) We watched "500 days of Summer" which was actually ok as far as rom-coms go although it did cross my mind to take a long "toilet trip" all the way home at one point!

We'd only exchanged one email before she gave me her number and arranged a date so I'm not too bothered that it didn't work out.The last hot chick and I exchanged quite a few emails/texts before meeting and I did feel there was a definite connection there before she got cold feet due to me telling her about my poker hobby and her thinking I'm probably a gambling loser type like her ex.( insert wee rolly eyes thing here!)

To far more important matters now and it's been confirmed that the "Striker" cartoon will no longer be carried in "The Sun" everyday.I've followed the fortunes of Nick Jarvis and Warbury for years. At least they go out as Champions League winners! Muddy Mildred indeed.

On the poker front things are still going quite well for this month despite me playing relatively few games.

Ok,thanks for reading.Back in two weeks...

Played with Wurld's Number Onest Sicko!

My cousin Two Pies came back to mine after our trip to Kilmarnock to watch the Gers draw 0-0.We played some Motorstorm,watched a ton of football on the box and later in the evening Two Pies was happy to watch as I hit the tables.

I felt like a change of pace from turbo sngs and opted to play in the Stars $55,$80k gtd and the $11 mtt ( $15k gtd I think) too.I've not played a $55 since I cashed $4.2k for a 5th place in one last July and the first few levels were so slow I remembered why I play turbo's.

As the post title is not " I won $$$!!!" you've probably guessed there's no tale of glory from either game.I did find it quite amusing that after moaning in yesterdays blog about the dozens of monotonous " x is such an ill sicko" threads on P5's that I should end up playing at the same table as Shaun Fucking Deeb in the $80k.I'm sure the worlds number one ranked Mtt player was bricking himself at facing the mighty Zagga and it wasn't long before he donked out in a face saving move to avoid the embarrassing pwnage which was coming his way.( I really don't need to add a wink or a smiley there do I?!)

I was down to one table when my 1010 fell to 77 in the $11 game ( no cash for finishing 653rd!) and after making the money in the $80k I opened out my game a little to try and add to my stack and give myself a chance of making the final table and cashing big.When I picked up Aces ( I had 20bb) with blinds at 500/1000 I joked with Two Pies that I'd better check the lobby to see where I was going to finish when they were busted....which of course they were when 99 spiked a 9 on the flop.218th from over 2000 starters aint bad but I needed a short break from the felt after that hand to let that sick feeling in my stomach pass.The only minor consolation was that I cashed for $103 but sadly three cashless $16's later soon ate that profit.

It was back to the Party $22's and $33's to finish and a couple of cashes mean I'm still sitting up a few hundred dollars over about 50 games there this month.I mentioned yesterday that I'm sometimes reluctant to grind a ton due to the fear of running badly and hitting another huge downswing.I listened to a 2+2 podcast the other day and one of the young hotshots said that he was running badly and his solution was to play more games.To non poker players that would probably seem like he was chasing his losses but his quite sensible logic was that he's a winning player and the only playing more volume helps ride out any short-term luck as skill will always win through in the end.I like that thinking.

Only one more week at work before I'm off for two weeks.Still no new talk of sabbaticals at my work and I've been tempted to raid the poker roll to grab a few days in the Dam or even a week away in the sunshine.The Dam is so expensive though that I'll probably just enjoy two weeks worth of long lies,lazy days and taking a break from posting here.

Back soon...( song is actually by Malcom McLaren not the Pistols though it's from the Great Rock n Roll Swindle film)

Donkey Call Alert!!

A quick 10 minute pain free visit to the dentist,celtc getting pumped in Europe and another winning night at the tables.Life is goot!

I was due to visit Mother Acorn last night but the last time I was over I hadn't shaved for a couple of days and she's now decided doesn't wish to see me unless I'm clean shaven.She's in her 60's now and this is her latest nonsense after her emails re what I should wear to my Uncle's recent Birthday bash which was held in a country pub.They go away to the US for a fortnight next week and hopefully I'll at least catch up with my Dad before then.

On the poker front things continue to go well for the moment.I did go 4-5 $22's without cashing but managed a couple of back to back wins to boost my roll nicely.Runs of 4-5 games or even slightly longer without cashing are almost everyday occurrences when playings sit n go games, however after previous downswings I'm very aware that 4-5 games can turn into 12-15 games or even hundreds of games without making a profit.If you touch fire as a child you wouldn't do it again and that may be part of the reason why I don't put in as much volume as I should.Every time I go a few cashless games I feel the heat of another possible downswing!

There's a great thread on P5's this week on emotions in poker.( makes a change from the usual crap about who the "Super illest sicko beast" is this week)
Emotional control at the tables is a huge part of the game and something I feel I deal with pretty well most of the time.I have only been 2-3 tabling recently though and I think that's partly to help me keep a lid on my emotions as well as allowing me to be able to pick up reads and play my best game.

Here's a wee hand I may have played like a donkey.I'm almost certain sng software such as Wiz would hate my call here and on reflection I think it's ok but marginal.Any thoughts/comments appreciated!

After paying my big blind of 400 I have 985 chips left.If I fold this hand I'll have 785 chips after paying the small blind in the next hand.If I shove ( assuming it's folded to me) the big blind will have odds to call and even if I somehow fold I'll have no fold equity against any of the other players when I finally do make my move.

The player raising seems to be a regular ( tight early/loose late in general) and his/her all in shove didn't seem incredibly strong.Of course a hand like 1010 totally dominates me here but I felt there were a lot of Broadway/high card combo's in his range and a lot of low-med pairs too, therefore I wouldn't be too far behind if I called with my 97 getting 3-1 to do so.I'd obviously have preferred 97 sooted or a far better hand to call off the remainder of my stack with , but as in life I can only play that hand that's dealt to me.Winning the hand gets me right back into contention and gives me much needed fold equity too.

Good enough reasons to call here or is it still essentially pure donkery to call here with 9 high? ( I've not hidden the result but obviously it's irrelevant)



***** Hand History for Game 8420407032 *****
NL Texas Hold'em $22 USD Buy-in Trny: 47481332 Level: 5 Blinds(200/400) - Monday, September 14, 00:32:03 BST 2009
Table Speed #1330156 (Real Money)
Seat 1 is the button
Total number of players : 6
Seat 4: Acornmn ( 1,385 )
Seat 5: AussieGizmo ( 3,920 )
Seat 3: biggio69 ( 2,220 )
Seat 7: huntress0 ( 4,385 )
Seat 1: lokko555 ( 4,060 )
Seat 8: what_A_RuN ( 4,030 )
Trny: 47481332 Level: 5
Blinds(200/400)
** Dealing down cards **
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to Acornmn [ 9s 7c ]
AussieGizmo folds
huntress0 is all-In [4,385]
what_A_RuN folds
lokko555 folds
biggio69 folds
Acornmn is all-In [985]
** Dealing Flop ** [ 8d, 6h, Qd ]
** Dealing Turn ** [ Ts ]
** Dealing River ** [ Kh ]
Acornmn shows [ 9s, 7c ]a straight, Six to Ten.
huntress0 shows [ Kd, Qc ]two pairs, Kings and Queens.
huntress0 wins 3,000 chips from the side pot 1 with two pairs, Kings and Queens.
Acornmn wins 2,970 chips from the main pot with a straight, Six to Ten.

All Time Low

Not only was it Nacho's 5th birthday the other day but it's also almost exactly two years since I moved back to my flat after 3yrs living with the ex.My only feelings for the ex these days are ones of anger and frustration over her plans to move to England and leave her 15yr old daughter ( Step Acorn) behind.I took Step A out for dinner last night and she's pretending she doesn't care and will be fine.The ex has another child ( in his 20's now) I never met she left to live with his Dad years ago and Step A reckons it's just her turn now.The ex has also shown no interest at all in seeing Nacho or hearing how he is after asking me to take him full time since back in May.I just can't understand that mentality.

Anyway it was great to see the wee one and I even got a hug from her as I dropped her off.( perhaps the free dinner,celeb mag and £10 helped!) I showed her the pic of Nacho I have as my mobile phone screen saver and got the verdict "cute pic,shit phone"! I also lost street cred for never having heard of her current favourite band,"All Time Low" but will hopefully gain some kudo's by giving her their cd when I give her a lift tomorrow.I am tempted to call my ex or even write to her regarding her plans but I doubt any contact with me would change her mind and if it was a phone call I can see myself losing my temper very quickly indeed.

I arrived back home just in time for Two Pies arrival to watch Rangers away game to Stuttgart in the Champions League.Rangers didn't seem to turn up for the first 20 mins but we clawed our way back into it after going a goal down and scored a cracking equaliser to take a point from the 1-1 scoreline.

Things that have got my goat part 9901010120:Listening to the radio on the way home the other night there was a report about a guy who had been sprayed in the face with cs gas by the police at close range after he had already been arrested and restrained.Radio 5 live said there was footage on the BBC website and that his parents were shocked by what had happened.I was shocked too, especially as he was only arrested for being drunk and disorderly....until they mentioned that this poor innocent had also allegedly spat in a paramedics face.Of course there were no interviews with the paramedics parents to get their views on how they felt about their son/daughter being ( allegedly) assaulted by this vile piece of scum as they were trying to do a professional job.

It's quite right that the gas in the face incident is being investigated because we live in a civilised society and can't let ourselves always be reduced to the lowest common denominator,however tempting, but my guess would be that there's more to this story than first meets the eye.( no mention of why paramedics were required in the first place etc).

Ok,enough for now.I promise to post an actual poker hand in my next post...

Raise the River HU Win

After a fine prawn dinner last night I fired up Stars for the $10 RTR forum Heads-Up challenge.I played Rubbish in the first round of the shootout format and managed to come back from an early tonking to take the match down.Next up was Rchpro and I had the advantage of watching a few of his final hands v Burnley Mik before we started.All I'd really picked up was that he seemed a solid enough player and he gave me a tough game before I finally made it through to the final v online pro and blogger Amatay.

My only real strategy throughout was to mix things up and try and stay on the front foot as often as possible.Amatay was my toughest opponent and I had to adjust rapidly to stop him running over me completely.Eventually I min-raised KK,Amatay shoved with 77 and I snap called to take most of his chips.( amazed Stars didn't deliver a 7 on the river!)

Including those three heads-up matches I've now won 6 in a row sngs on Stars and I half expected the poker gods to even things up at the Party $22's.I wasn't wrong as I had KK and QQ busted by Jacks,ran QQ into AA and couldn't win a flip either for my first few games.I watched a Braminc training video and loaded up a couple more $22's before bed.I did have one quite funny delayed bad beat moment when I was heads up in one game and down to the last three in the other.In the first game the villain had me slightly covered as we got it all in.I had KK and he showed K4.I switched my attention to the other table and remember feeling suprised when the "Congrats you've cashed for $$" popped up on Table one.Maybe he didn't have me covered afterall.....or maybe his feckin K4 rivered a straight and I'd taken $60 for 2nd instead of the $100 I was expecting to see! At least I took other one down!

Ok,the s-man is coming over this evening and I've arranged to pick up Step A and take her for dinner tomorrow night.Any any ideas how to make conversation with a 15yr girl who seems to give one word answers to any questions thrown at her? Seriously though I'm really looking forward to seeing her.Not being part of her upbringing after splitting from her Mum a couple of years back has been very hard to deal with and I actually feel quite proud that the wee one still wants to see me.I can't have done that bad a job helping to looking after her when I stayed with them.

Anyways thanks for reading.Back soon...

Three in a row

It's strange how the human mind works.I feel like I should be posting today as I've had a decent run at the virtual felt over the last couple of nights and yet there doesn't seem much to say.Well apart from moaning that Sharkscope is still tilting me hard by failing to record more of my Party sng cashes! I played just two $22's late yesterday afternoon,taking a 1st and a 2nd just as the s-man arrived for our weekly ps3/movie fest.Sharkscope missed both results.

If I was organised I'd probably keep my own spreadsheet to calculate my actual roi/hourly rate on Party, but I've grown so used to using Sharky for tracking my sng play on Stars ( almost 100% coverage) that apart from keeping monthly stats I've never bothered with any other records.

Anyways after the s-man arrived yesterday we fired up the PS3,got stuck into Motorstorm Pacific Rift and managed to squeeze the Bond film "Quantum of Solace" in too.The s-man was also kind enough to help me get a new ad up on my blog and also to inform me that my Ipod Nano thingy can play video podcasts too.( I thought it was audio only) I've just downloaded "The Damned United" vid podcast and it works! I loved the book and will be getting the film out to rent soon."I wouldn't say I was the best manager in the business. But I was in the top one." is one of my favourite Cloughie quotes.

When the s-man left I fired up a couple of $27 sng's on Stars and took down both of them to boost my Stars roll to just over the $500 mark.Having won the last sng I played on Stars the other night( a $16 sng)that makes it three wins in a row which makes a change for me on Stars as I've run horribly there over the last few hundred games.

So far then it's been a decent month at the virtual felt, mainly thanks to running well this weekend.I've only played about 40 sng's so far though since Sept 1st and really need to crank up the volume and get grinding more.When not running like total crap it's easy to get carried away and lose track of the fact that I make around $2 per game regardless of short-term results.If I'm going to keep that mindset during downswings then I need to keep thinking that way when things are going reasonably well too.

Plans for this week? Well I haven't seen Step A for a couple of weeks as she's not been going to her Dads so I've offered to take her out for something to eat next week to catch up.Rangers first Champions League game away to Stuggart is on Wednesday night,I've got the dentist on Thursday and a ticket for the Gers away game on Saturday.

Back soon...

Friday Update

I watched Scotland blow our World Cup qualifying chances in typical Scottish fashion the other night after going down 1-0 to a late Dutch goal.We played well and should have beaten them, however earlier losses to the footballing giants of Norway ( "You only sing when you're fishing") and Macedonia meant we failed yet again.Taxi for Burley...

I also watched the second half of the women's Euro final between Germany and England.The Germans apparently dominate women's football and I did feel a little sorry for the English girl co-commentating who insisted the gap between them and the Germans was closing with the score sitting at 3-2 to Germany...just before the German ladies rattled in another 3 to make it a 6-2 hammering.

On the poker front I played a couple of $16 Single table sng's on Stars and took down one of them.I'll probably return to Stars on Sunday for the Raisetheriver Heads Up Championship.I've finished first more often than any other position when playing sng's but unless the blinds start at 400/800 I'll be dead money as my heads up game is pretty weak overall.

I moved to Party afterwards ( still as Acornmn although a name change may be imminent)and played a $22 and a $33 before bed and crashed out of both.In the $22 I reraised a late position steal attempt with AK and lost to 87 before bubbling the $33 when my A7 fell to A4.I do quite fancy taking a proper shot at the $33's and will do so if the company I work for don't offer our department the sabbatical option this month as has been rumoured.I felt a bit unlucky after those exits until I read about the poor guy killed by a bus crashing through the window of a bookies in Manchester.Now that really is a bad beat.

Away from the poker I've been wondering about some of the dating site ad's I've come across recently.Some ladies state " No weirdo's or perverts" on their ads and I wondered how effective this tactic is.Do some blokes get half way through replying before spotting that line and thinking "Ahh that's a shame,she seems lovely but I'm such a perving oddball weirdo I'd better not get in touch"?

Ok,thanks for reading.Back soon...

Knowing Me,Knowing You

I didn't play a hand on Monday night and last night managed to play six $22's without cashing.I didn't run well but probably didn't play that well either.One of my main leaks is that I'm terrible at folding big hands preflop even when I know I'm beaten and last night was no exception.I raised QQ from early position at the start of the game,faced a reraise from a random ( not a known player to me) and a flat call from a tight regular which just screamed Aces.I shoved over the top and didn't hit my 2 outer v KK and the inevitable AA.Doh!

As I was playing I came across an interesting thread on 2+2 about Party sng regulars changing their screen-names.I didn't even know it was possible, although it makes perfect sense as a number of $22/$33 regulars seem to have simply vanished from the scene.I do my poker homework (usually watching training vids) and spent an hour the other night simply checking Sharkscope stats and adding notes next to players already in games.All that work is is probably a waste of time if they're constantly changing.I do feel a bit exposed too knowing that other regulars probably know my game and I'm treating them as unknown randoms.I may only play a couple of hundred games per month but I have over 4k hands on some players so I assume some of them know me.

One advantage of playing on Party is that I can select where to sit in any particular game.Usually when a game fills the first few regulars to register always sit as far from each other as possible,preferring to have random fish on their immediate left or right.It's frustrating to know that those random fish could easily be top regulars who have simply changed names since I last played them.

I still think the Party $22's are quite soft, but now that I know the option is available I'm wondering if I should change my own screen name.Information is knowledge in poker and although I like to think I deviate enough from the ranges other regulars would expect me to be playing often enough to stop my play from being too predictable, flying completely under the radar could be a huge advantage.( well maybe not huge but any additional edge is always welcome).I'm not sure if there's an option on the screen or I'd need to email Party with an decent excuse to get my name changed.Of course my poker ego wouldn't like having to start over re Sharkscope stats but their coverage is so poor ( 80% and they've now missed at least six first place finishes) that I shouldn't let that affect my decision.

Not got much else today.Looking forward to watching Scotland play Holland tonight in a must win game for us if we're to have any chance of making a play off for the World Cup.

I was also sorry to read that Rosie is quitting her girliepoker blog, although I had a laugh at Joppa's comment ( tongue in cheek I'm sure) about Rosie being "full of herself".It's funny how we build up an idea of what someone is like in real life from reading their blog and how far off reality those impressions can be.Even reading Rosie's own words about crushing anyone who wished to verbally spar with her made me smile because whilst she's certainly nobody's fool, she's also a million miles away from being "full of herself" or aggressive in any way.Given our history I'll leave it at that, but I look forward to reading more from Rosie over at her Food Blog.( and one day I may even attempt to cook up one of those tv dinners!)

Back soon...

The Gambler

Hot Chick reckoned I was lovely ( is that the same as "nice"?!) but her ex had a gambling problem and she said she'd be a fool to risk putting herself in that situation again.I did try and explain how poker works when we met up, but obviously as far as outsiders are concerned it's just another form of gambling and gambling is for losers.

Perhaps I could have been more persuasive and made it clearer that I've been consistently crushing the game since I began and have recorded nearly $35k in net profit from low stakes play.

I did mention paying my car loan off back in January ( at which point she asked how much I lose) and that poker is people v people and not played against the house.I didn't want to spent our date talking poker though, and perhaps I didn't make enough of the fact that I only use my on line bankroll to play and that I'm skilled enough both at the game and with my bankroll management to never,ever require a fresh deposit.

All very frustrating, but perhaps as the chick flick says, she just wasn't that into me.( or not enough to get to know me well enough to realise I'm about as far from being a crazy gambler as it's possible to get)

To the weekend and the s-man was over on Friday night and my cousin Two Pies came over on Saturday to watch the Scotland game and for some PS3 action.Motorstorm Pacific Rift is still the game of choice and I was delighted to receive an email via my ps3 account which simply stated "Fuck you bastard" from a player I must have knocked off his bike by dishing out a swift punch.Sweet!

At the tables I'd dropped a couple of hundred Dollars over the last week before going on a decent run which included three wins in a row to leave me up a bit for Sept so far.I suppose a non poker player would be horrified at losing £120 in one week or even having £40-£50 in play at one time when 3-4 tabling.Winning players know their expected return on investment per game and that short-term results are not a factor.If only prospective dates knew that too....

Ok,thanks for reading.Back soon...

For An Angel

It's been a busy week and I've not played much poker.Back after the weekend.Have a good one...

Monthly Stats

I finally met up with Hot Chick today at lunchtime and the good news is that she is even hotter in person than she is in her photo's ! We seemed to hit it off quite well and hopefully a proper dinner date is next on the cards...


I'm loving my new Ipod thingy and wish I'd joined the digital music age years ago! The only problem I've had is that I can't listen to any more Frankie Boyle podcasts as I walk round the town due to the high chance of me being locked up for laughing and grinning like even more of an idiot than usual!

In other news I'm in correspondence with the lovely Vicky Coren.We're discussing her childhood at the moment and anyone else claiming they got the same generic email from her representing Pokerstars is obviously blatantly lying!

To the poker and I've had another go at trying to help my Mum at the micro-limit sngs and have to say I'm pretty astounded by just how terrible most of the villains are.When I began playing nearly 5 yrs ago $25nl was the lowest level available for cash play and I began playing sngs at $5.50 so I've never had to venture into the fish infested waters of the lowest levels.Without doubt adjustments are required.Raising 5bb preflop at the $3.40's still seems to attract three callers!Anyway after a good start my Mums tiny roll is nearly busted and only a few Double or nothing $1.10 games have kept it solvent.

I'm still unsure about posting monthly stats but I'll keep posting them until the end of October ( end of 5th yr of online play) and see how I feel then.Once again I didn't put in much volume but can't complaint at my results for August.

Party $4200 ( + $672 over 149 games ) Pokerstars $348 ( -$62 over 66 games) FT $ 95 ( =)

Total $4643 ( + $610)